If there were a Half Japanese album you could logically insert into a playlist between Archie Bell & The Drells and Tony Joe White (I checked; there isn’t), it might kinda sound like this. Alternately, if former members of early New Alliance acts like the Minutemen and Plebs got together with a few members of the Mekons because they all got kicked out of their bands because all they wanted to do all day was sit in the bar drinking Schlitz and listening to Arthur Conley on the jukebox, and they formed a band and recorded an album on a Sunday night in the back room by the pool table and air conditioner, that album might also sound like this. There’s also an outside chance that this album just sprung fully-formed from the forehead of Zeus, like Athena. Don’t bet against it; this record is strangely indispensible and Montreal is a really weird place. BEST SONG: “Love without Friction.” BEST SONG TITLE: “Acceptable List of Games for a Socialized Human.” FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA FACT: The spine reads, in its entirety: “Tha Retail Simple-Tones play that good ol’ Reverberant Scratch. Here are 9 Shots in tha Dark by these nogoodnik lateral movers for U 2 get down 2. All this and more in Teetotalling Punkoramic hifi stereo audio: Identify this record with following code: TPR-122”. Please make a note of it.–Rev. Nørb (Total Punk)