I tried to make food yesterday and looking at the giant pile in the sink I thought, “Fuck, I have no dishes.” I did have dishes. I just didn’t have clean dishes. They were there, they were just dirty.
The mess in the sink got my thinking about emotional availability in interpersonal relationships. We’re not always honest about how much we can actually give other people. When we say, “fuck, I have no dishes” some people just mean they have dishes that need cleaning, but some people mean they literally don’t own dishes. Some relationships call for a little time and effort, and some are just, to further the sink metaphor, draining.
It takes work to open yourself to your friends, and some people don’t or can’t or won’t put that work in.
You can’t change other people. You can do your own dishes to make your own food. You can do your friend’s dishes if they need some help, but they need to ask for help. You can’t break into someone’s house to do their dishes. Especially if they don’t own any.
Support women and queers and femmes in punk.
Prioritize your own mental health and well being.
Recognize when you deserve to be treated better.
Treat others better.
Do your fucking dishes.
all my love,
Benny The Jet Rodriguez, “Stand Around” Home.Run. (Recess)
Sports (from Ohio), “Stunted” All of Something (Father Daughter)
Slutever, “Maggot” Almost Famous (Self-released)
Sleater-Kinney, “The End of You” The Hot Rock (Sub Pop)
P.S. Eliot, “Watch On Mute” Sadie (Salinas)
WILD FLAG, “Future Crimes” Wild Flag (Merge)
Palehound, “Flytrap” Bent Nail (Exploding In Sound)
Veruca Salt, “Laughing In The Sugar Bowl” Ghost Notes (El Camino Media)
Radiator Hospital, “Cut Your Bangs” Torch Song (Salinas)
Martha, “Dust, Juice, Bones and Hair” Courting Strong (Salinas)
DILLY DALLY, “Get To You” Sore (Partisan)
Heavens To Betsy, “Terrorist” Calculated (Kill Rock Stars)
Joanna Gruesome, “Pretty Fucking Sick (Of It All)” Pretty Fucking Sick (Of It All) Single, (Slumberland)
Babes In Toyland, “Won’t Tell” Fontanelle (Reprise)
Ex Hex, “You Fell Apart” Rips (Merge)
7 Year Bitch, “Kiss My Ass Goodbye” Viva Zapata! (C/Z)
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