MOONDOGS: When Sixteen Wasn’t So Sweet: 12” EP

I’m not sure what it means for the health and vitality of Da Scene In General when we keep having to strip-mine the kicks of the past in order to best facilitate the kicks of the present, but I suppose it’s sorta like fossil fuel: You basically just hope you die before you run out of stuff. That said, these five obscure-as-the-white-buffalo power pop (ish) gems (as recorded on January 1st, 1980—I seem to recall watching Blondie on TV whilst babysitting the night before) leave me precious little to really complain about: They sound a bit like a roughed-up, basement Shoes, with lyrics that deviate unexpectedly from tropes of the genre (e.g., the title track is a sweet and catchy pop song that somehow winds up with guns on the beach). The three songs on the A side are faster and shorter, the two on the flip are longer and slower; none of it is fast and short nor long and slow enough to be noteworthy in its fastness and shortness nor longness and slowness. One must wonder how the hell songs as good as these can go essentially unheard at the time, and only be dragged, squinting, into the light of day the better part of four decades later. Ah well, if our fate is well and truly in the hands of Rock’s archaeologists, so be it. Drill, baby, drill! BEST SONG: “When Sixteen Wasn’t So Sweet.” BEST SONG TITLE: “Moon Wave Surfers.” FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA FACT: The Moondogs were WWF tag team champions in the early ‘80s, and Moondog Spot died in the ring in 2003. ¬–Rev. Nørb (Almost Ready)