BESMIRCHERS, THE: Hate Your Life: LP

I’m always a little amazed at the presence of a new Besmirchers record… mostly amazed that they remain alive to release one. There can be a certain tendency to dismiss them as just another foul-smelling gaggle of bloody, drunken dopes, but their records are always so well-produced and their packaging so flawlessly deluxe that you really have no choice other than to take them seriously—odd as it seems, they’re obviously not half-assing anything. And, while I can’t say that hot girls (or ugly guys) cutting themselves up does a ton for my appetite—sexual or otherwise—if you long for (or were just too little for) the vile thunder of Poison Idea, Antiseen, or GG Allin circa 1990, the Besmirchers have your fix. Now boil it down, cook it up in a spoon, have your girlfriend tie you off with a pair of dirty panties, and shoot it in your dick. BEST SONG: “Dirty Panty Tourniquet.” BEST SONG TITLE: “Dirty Panty Tourniquet.” FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA FACT: Counterintuitively, this is some of the prettiest pink/red spatter vinyl I’ve seen all year. –Rev. Nørb (Slope)