SNEAKY PINKS: I Can’t Wait: 7” EP

…these guys sent me their first 45 a while ago, and, while i distinctly remember that it had a picture of Little Richard on the sleeve and came wrapped in tinfoil, i could not, after significant toil, account for the whereabouts of the item when questioned. Following a live performance that was, by my recollection, both vaguely amusing and mercifully brief (about ten minutes of a nude guy shoving a White Flag reject lookin’ dude if memory holds), i wound up with a copy of the second 45, under strict orders from a formerly nude gentleman not to lose it without listening to it as with the first one. I can say with some assurance that i was not expecting much from the record. I was in ERROR! In ERROR I SAY!!! The a-side, “I Can’t Wait,” is a THING of SHEEREST GENIUS!!! A low-fi—hell, no-fi—ode to underage ugly-bumpin’ that reminds the listener what the fuck the big deal was about those Radio X/Super

Teem era Brentwoods/Donnas/Bobbyteens 45s, anyway, melding that whole mid-‘90s SuperCatchy Darin Ravioli aesthetic with that “sensitive but horny” Buddy Holly via the Ramones crunch of M.O.T.O. “Everybody says that you’re too young/Everybody says that I’m too dumb/Come on little girl let’s have some fun/Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah!” Well RIGHT THE FUCK ON, formerly naked dude! “Eighteen years is a long long time” indeed! B-side is three more bursts of jeenyus, including the immortal couplet “I wanna blowjob/I wanna hot dog.” Strange as this may sound, this might be the best 7” 45 with one song on the A-side and three songs on the B-side since “Nervous Breakdown,” unless i forgot about something. Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah! BEST SONG: “I Can’t Wait” BEST SONG TITLE: “Life Stupid I Stupid” FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA FACT: The plain pink labels are not actually plain pink paper; they are a tint screen of magenta on white stock. Also, i still don’t know the name of that Goner Records font.  –norb (Rubber Vomit)