SKULLS/BETTER DEAD THAN RED: Nations of Pride: CD

I’ve got a little secret to share with you: Ever wonder why skins are so pissed off? It’s because no one ever took the time to tell them that keeping all your hair off for prolonged periods of time causes your dick to shrivel up until it’s no larger than a cherry pit. It’s true. Just ask your doctor if you don’t believe me. This is the very reason they go around beating people up, engage in blind, patriotic flag-waving and eventually join the Marines to fight in wars started by the rich people they so often profess to despise. Hey, they’ve got to find some way to alleviate all the sexual frustration they’re feeling. Why do you think they call ‘em “boneheads”? Because they’re always thinkin’ about sex. See, bands like the Cockney Rejects, 4 Skins and the Templars are well aware of the dangers of cropping the coif too often and that’s why you’ll see them with follicle noodles on their noggin every now and then. So what’s all this have to do with the bands on this disc, you ask? Well, Better Dead than Red apparently have plenty to be angry about, if you know what I mean, and the Skulls make it patently clear that the problem thrives in Brazil as well. Pity them.

 –jimmy (Pro Am)