RIVERBOAT GAMBLERS, THE: Something to Crow About: CD

These last two months, crawling though the endless amount of music that gets sent us, it’s a rare CD from an unknown band that gets instantly glued to my home and truck stereos. By sheer hours amassed listening along, the Riverboat Gamblers have called my bluff and plunked down a royal, colossal sonic buffet that’ll get you fucked upper than hell. They’re so good, I’m going to sound like an asshole trying to explain them, but here goes. First off, all cliches are wiped away like insect guts off a windshield. Serve up all the best New Bomb Turks songs onto one album. Hyper-velocity, swaggering vocals where all the words are actually sung, actually sound fun. If they started a gang, you’d join in a split second. Pile on the too easy to be easy instrumental velocity of the Candy Snatchers. Like chicken grease, squeeze all the bravado, sleaze, and sneer of The Humpers’ prime form on top. Add two scoops of that covert pop element cloaked in hard-beaten, hard-won punk, like the Black Halos. Then, somehow, make it fucking catchy, claim it like it’s never been done before, let it buck you home, then it bake in the Texas sun and have Tim Kerr produce it. Something to Crow About has so much energy, I swear lightning bolts are going to sizzle out of the speakers and light my carpet on fire. This is in serious running for a top ten of 2003 for me.

 –todd (Gearhead)