THIS IS IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOVEMBER 2ND IS VOTING DAY, SO VOTE.
BUT THEN.......................................attend the..................ELECTION DAY ROADSIT!!!!!
First of all, about half of you may be wondering what on earth a "roadsit" is. Well, it's just what it sounds like, a roadsit! We sit by the road and drink beer and watch cars go by and hoist our beers to them and they honk back and it's all well and wonderful and life is great and then more cars come and we hoist more beers and they honk and all is better and so forth and so on and so FORTH! Okay, now you know what a roadsit is.
On Nov. 2nd, THAT'S ELECTION DAY, QUITE POSSIBLY THE MOST IMPORTANT ELECTION DAY IN OUR LIVES!!!!!, we will be throwing a roadsit at my current home (the woodshed and the residence next door, the trailer). Seeing as how we live just a half mile south of the Liberty Grove voting station polling place, everyone in northern Door County (Wisconisn) will be driving right past our little (soon to be GIGANTUAN) roadsit! We welcome all voters to join us and stop by for a beer (Blatz, we aint cheap!) and a brat (or more if you wish). if you didn't vote, you aren't invited!
BUT, YOU'RE WONDERING "IS THAT ALL?" Well, of course not. Ruckus Thomas and I wouldn't invite people from all over the world to attend our little roadsit if we didn't offer more. Here's the particulars!
Read and enjoy, but then start packing your bags because YOU'RE COMING, REGARDLESS OF WHATEVER AND ALL THAT!
ELECTION DAY ROADSIT '04
10987 OLD STAGE ROAD
SISTER BAY, WI (DOOR COUNTY)
ROADSIT STARTS AT 7AM, NOV. 2ND, 2004
WE WILL BE OFFERING EGGS AND BACON WITH BLOODY MARYS FOR THE FIRST FEW HOURS, WITH A GAS STOVE OUT BY THE ROAD TO COOK UP THE GOODNESS, AND BLATZ ON TAP WILL BE OFFERED THROUGHOUT THE DAY (DON'T WORRY, WE HAVE BACK-UP BARRELS, multiple backups). THEN THE REST OF THE DAY WE WILL BE OFFERING FREE BRATS (that's bratwursts to you non-midwesterners [I just wish I could say it slower for you]) and my world famous RHYTHM CHILI!!!!!
NO, THAT'S NOT ALL!!!
ALSO, THERE WILL BE FREE RHYTHM CHICKEN CONCERTS THROUGHOUT THE DAY, EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR, FRONT ROW SEATS, OUT BY THE ROAD!!!!!
NO, THAT'S NOT ALL!!!!
YOU CAN EVEN SIGN THE GUESTBOOK! YES, IT'S TRUE!
NO, THERE'S MORE!
YOU CAN SEE, IN PERSON, MY EMBALMING MACHINE! EVEN MORE TRUE!
WAIT, WAIT, THERE'S MORE YET!
WE'LL BE POLLING PASSING MOTORISTS (IN THE EVENT THAT THEY DON'T STOP AND JOIN US) WITH SIGNS SAYING "HONK IF YOU VOTED" SO WE CAN PERFORM OUR OWN EXIT POLL!
WAIT, I'M NOT DONE!
YOU CAN SIGN UP TO WIN A TOUR OF THE RHYTHM CHICKEN'S WOODSHED, COMPLETE WITH GASMASK!
GO BACK INTO THE WOODS AND SEE WHERE MY OLD DEAD CAR USED TO BE RAMMED UP AGAINST A TREE BEFORE SOME JUNKYARD GUYS CAME AND STOLE IT!
SEE THE INFAMOUS TRAILER AND IT'S EQUALLY INFAMOUS WALL OF SHAME!
AND LAST, BUT MOST CERTAINLY NOT LEAST, YOU CAN SEE.....
That's Hojon, the best doggy in the entire world, and his amazing beer drinking prowess!
Be american, do your part, join our roadsit!
FROM WITHIN WISCONSIN:
Go to green bay, then take 57 north all the way to Sister Bay, then turn right at BUMPER TO BUMPER onto Hill Road. Take Hill Road to Old Stage Road, turn left and it's the first roadsit on your left! Park your car and help yourself to the beer, brats, and unlimited fun - if you voted!
Fly or drive to Green Bay, rent a car or hitch-hike from there following the directions above, and if you're not driving then crack open a beer because you're gonna have to catch up with everyone already at the roadsit! Once again... you gotta vote first, or you're not invited.
Fly to Chicago, and then fly to Milwaukee, and then take a Greyhound to Green Bay, and then walk to the Exclusive Company and ask Timebomb Tom how to get to the Rhythm Chicken's hometown and follow his instructions EXACTLY, or perish! (Or just get to Green Bay and follow the above directions.) And as always, you gotta vote if you wanna tote.
BE A COOL AMERICAN
VOTE AND SIT!
IF YOU CANNOT ATTEND, YOU WILL NEVER BE FORGIVEN, BUT TO REDEEM YOUR SELF-ESTEEM, YOU CAN REPLY EMAIL ME WITH YOUR ABSENTEE BALLOT.
This election day Roadsit sponsored by:
RUCKUS THOMAS INDUSTRIES
THE SHORELINE RESTAURANT
KRIST'S GROCERY STORE
BLATZ BREWING COMPANY