NAGG: Self-Titled: CD

Jul 11, 2007

...having become Razorcake’s de facto glam critic simply by virtue of having enough interest in the source materials to be able to call people on their shit when they’re underperforming, i have found that the legitimacy of most of the modern-day would-be glamsters, to me, is called into immediate question by their not doing the things that i imagine i would do were i in their position (i.e., covering, say, “Really Gonna Raise the Roof” by Slade, covering something written by Chapman and Chinn, etc.). Imagine, then, my consternation and disgruntlement when i am finally confronted with a “glam” band (i don’t know... they’re kind of fucking ugly for a glam band. They should all be prettier, like myself) who actually DO cover, say, “Really Gonna Raise The Roof” by Slade, a Chapman/Chinn penned number (“She’s in Love with You” by Suzi Quatro) (Quatro, Schmatro—it still counts), etc.—and they STILL don’t have it right. I mean, the guitar player handles the “Really Gonna Raise the Roof” riff so uncapably that one would almost swear that he’s got a wireless unit on his guitar and is playing it without benefit of headphones or monitors from a parked truck three blocks down the street from the studio, the “Bam banma loo banma baby, the man in blue says can you keep it clean” line (occasionally mis-transcribed as “Bam BAM A loo” etc., which is too Little Richard to be correct) right after the solo doesn’t go “BUH-BUH-BUH-Banma Loo Banma Baby” as it should (the “BUH-BUH-BUH” indicating elevated levels of frenzy and riotiousness)—hell, even the little decayed drum stutter before the end is all wrong. Further, at no point in time should any glam record remind me of Pat Benatar (actually, i think that would hold for non-glam items as well) and they should have covered that “Whoa baby you’re a nag” song by Joan Jett. Off with their heads i suppose. BEST SONG: “She’s in Love with You” BEST SONG TITLE: “Really Gonna Raise the Roof,” which, for the record, is supposed to be spelled in Sladean English with the N’s and S’s backwards (funny that spell-check doesn’t pick up on that) FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA ANSWER: Lexington Express!

 –norb (Dollar Record)