MEAN JEANS: On Mars: LP

Who saw this coming? The Mean Jeans second LP is a concept rock opera pitting the tenets of a nihilistic dystopia against the Fountainhead’s solipsistic self-justifications! Just fuckin’ with you; this isn’t Rush. The Mean Jeans time travel to perpetual adolescence. They travel in a wood panel ‘70s Country Squire station wagon of the mind. Inside, it’s adorned with Billy Dee Williams and BillyOcean posters and life-slogans (“Works Every Time” / “Get out of My Dreams and into My Car,”). I love the mongoloid-haiku lyrics. You try being this stupid without permanent brain damage or devolving into late-Queers-”My Cunt’s a Cunt”ville before casting any stones. So if you’ve ever peed just a little in your pants while watching Alf, poured out the first sips to the dearly departed Joey, believe that the world can be solved by playing video games—only in arcades (and bigger troubles need life-sized joysticks for resolution a-la Joysticks)—that mini-bikes and toobin’ a river make more sense than mortgages and “showing up on time,” the Means Jeans’ll match your inseam. Like 138 + 420 = Keanu. Differences from the first LP? The forlorn, ballad-y almost misty-eyed counterpoint to the Ramones’ “I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend” is the fuck you, you fucking robot “Don’t Stop Partying.” Almost makes me want to cry. And wish my tears were gin. And then I’d drink my sorrows away. Thank you, Mean Jeans. Thank you.

 –todd (Dirtnap, dirtnaprecs.com)