INTERNATIONAL NOISE CONSPIRACY, THE: Capitalism Stole My Virginity: CD-single

Simple rock’n’roll here with a keyboard. The problem is, there is no rock in their roll. These songs stir nothing in me. Not that they are awful; they just don’t do anything for me. Now, with that aside, I got a chance to see this band live on tour with The Hives (who were fucking great and should not be missed). I decided to wait around and give them a chance. I saw the keyboard and right away I was like, “uh oh.” Then they came out. It was very strange. The band looked like they were rocking out. Everybody had all the “rock” moves down pat. The music was a different story. It was as if someone was playing a joke on them and unplugged all their instruments and played a tape of a dull rock band with a keyboard instead. My eyes and ears were in a bit of an argument together. Then, they continued to play and I realized that it was indeed the band on stage that was coming out of the speakers. Even when the singer introduced the band members and they did there little solo jam thing, it still didn’t jive. The bass player stepped forward and went crazy but the music never really changed. This all fucked with my alcohol-soaked brain and I ran out of the club screaming for my mommy.

 –toby (Burning Heart)