GOLDEN PELICANS: Self-titled: LP

This might be the most satisfying record, from start to finish, that I’ve bought in a long time. It’s mastered loud as fuck (and I swear it gets louder somewhere on the second side). I could be confusing this with the feeling I had eating the best burrito I’ve had in a long time while I was listening to this album. As a matter of fact, this album is the perfect length to eat a giant-ass, messy burrito to. I was able to finish said burrito and wash my hands just in time for the last song to finish. What perfect timing! Was some kind of science or hoodoo involved? I don’t know! I do know that Golden Pelicans are as good on record as they are live. They have a song about escaping New Jersey. It must have been written for me, because I escaped New Jersey! Actually, I talked to singer King G once and he said it’s about his ex-wife. Good enough! Also, there’s a song called “Pissing in a Puddle of Puke,” which has gotta be the best song title ever, or at least since the last time I made that proclamation. If I have to complain about something, and I do, it’s that all the songs on this record aren’t called “Pissing in a Puddle of Puke.” 

 –Sal Lucci (Total Punk)