ERGS, THE: That’s It… Bye: 12”EP

At first, I was thinking, “What hubris. What excess.” I mean, I like improved sound quality as much as the next person who values records over clothing and I’m a huge fan of the 12” 45 format, but a three-song 12” that isn’t Tarkus-inspired jams? C’mon, dudes, I know it’s impressive that you played back-to-back sets at the Fest to thousands of people, but that’s no reason to slap your vinyl/dongs in other bands’ faces. These three songs could have handily fit on a 7” 45. It wouldn’t even have to go to 33. Think about the whales, Sally Struthers, dolphins and Al Gore, man. Then, before uncorking my bile-sprayer, I found out that the 7” machine at the plant that was pressing the record had broken. The only solution to getting this swan song out on time was to press the biggest (in size) 7” in history. I’m still not comfortable in this post-Ergs! world. It kinda sucks, but thanks for three more songs. I hope none of you join Guns’n’Roses.

 –todd (Don Giovanni, www.dongiovannirecords.com)