First song: “With you gone, I’ll never make it. You took my heart, now don’t you break it. If I could just look into your eyes, and feel your heart beat next to mine.” Look, I’ve been to Medford, Oregon before. It’s a pretty shitty town. I understand. But that does not excuse the fact that I felt it necessary to actually turn this down for fear of people actually thinking that I was putting it on of my own volition. Six songs that straddle the four minute mark; lifeless mid-tempo “melodic punk” with wah-wah guitars, multi-tracked saccharine vocals and lyrics that go straight for the jugular, if the jugular was full of sap, sugar, and obviousness. I mean, okay, there are flittering moments where they sound eerily like Pulley or something, but with the creepy-ass bat skeleton and stressed, damaged Certificate font on the cover, these guys should be sued for misrepresentation. Sometimes being somewhat culturally isolated (like, say, living in Medford) can produce some stunning results, a forging of new ground. Other times, you just wind up aping your heroes, badly.