If you think eighth-note bass rhythms and an occasional minor chord = The Wipers, then, whoopee ding, i present unto you the French Wipers. Me, i’m more inclined to say Les Marked Men at present, although i suppose the smart money makes some kind of reference to the Clorox Girls ((who are already too French by proxy for their own good)) at this point. Actually, now that i’m actually reading the lyrics, i think i’ll change my order to be a French Wipers who really sound more like the Marked Men or Clorox Girls and learned everything there is to know about lyrical structure from the first Discharge album. Par example: “People says I’m greedy / People says I’m greedy / but I have my friend / my German friend / now I’m happy / I can travel / now I will travel for free / now I’m in my train / yes I’m in my train / I’m gonna see Poland / I’m gonna see Poland.” That is the lyrical entirety of the first song. Somebody call up Greg Sage and get his sign-off on this, won’t you? BEST SONG: “Violence” BEST SONG TITLE: “No Girls” FANTASTIC AMAZING TRIVIA FACT: Came with a Biographie!